Friday, January 6, 2012

[1/6] stuff my kids said today

 One of my girls explains how a maze works:
If you get trapped by a ghost, you're lost.
One of my kids had finished a connect-the-dots picture of a birthday cake.  I "pretended" to want to eat it.  My kid responds:
Don't you get it, Miss Anna?  It's just a dot-to-dot!  Do NOT eat it!  It's just coloring!
One boy comments on another's choice in hats:
Mason!  You're half-pirate, Mason!
One girl explains why I sometimes have trouble with them misbehaving:
 Well... we don't listen to you when you're here, but we do listen when Miss Stacey's (the main teacher) here... because we don't want to get in trouble.  (You'll still get in trouble if you don't listen to me, though.) Oooohhhhhhhhh....
Every day when we transition from outside to inside, we pretend to be secret agents (a better way of saying, let's all be insanely quiet as we walk to our classroom).  One boy decides:
I'm secret Batman!
As one girl plays with the kitchen set, I overhear the following:
Shake stuff is medicine, sometimes.
Uhmmm... who put the bacon on me?  (response from another little girl: "The teacher.") 
I think he should go to elementary school, never be here again.  So he won't disturb you anymore.
One little boy is obsessed with all things fireman-related.  He wears a fireman helmet everyday (or did for the majority of the fall "semester"), and plays with the Rescue Heroes constantly.  I overhear him talking on the walkie-talkie:
Come in!  This is Fireman Siff!  Come in!  ...New coffee, thanks!
I was having trouble figuring out what a girl's drawing was... she explained it rather nicely:
This is a lovely piano... and lovely shoes... and hearts... and a lovely pink tongue!
One boy and I have a scar on the same place over our left eyebrows.  I pointed this out to him, and the other kids overheard.  So, for the next ten minutes, they chanted:
You lost an eyebrow!  You lost an eyebrow!
As we lined up to go inside, one boy asserted:
I hate... I hate the MOON!  (Why, hon?) I hate the moon because the moon kind of chases my home.  And I don't like that!
Another says (no explanation necessary):
I want a pet eagle!
One boy drew a picture of a really fat man.  There were features of the man I could identify, but beneath the belly button, I saw something that seemed a bit strange.  It looked like three parallel lines to the side of the stomach.  I spent the next half-hour trying to get the boy to tell me what it was.  These are some of my favorite lines from that conversation:
I don't wanna tell... it's kind of secret.  (Lots of giggles.)
Only boys have 'em - right here (He points to his chest, and one little girl who is eavesdropping says: BOOBIES! I reply, No... boys don't have boobies.  He responds, with a huge smile on his face:) My daddy does!
 I don't wanna tell you... because you might tell the other kids and... it might freak you out.
Ok, I'll give you a hint... (Writes the letters O-T-S on his paper) What's that spell?  (I said, Ots.  At this point, he busts up laughing - slapping his knees - and says:) I tricked you!  That's not a clue!
Here's a REAL clue:  it kinda rhymes with 'three'.  (The eavesdropping girl shouts in response: TURTLES!)
Once I finally got him to whisper it in my ear, because I was thoroughly intrigued and confused, he said:
It's... a three-pack!  You know?  Part of your muscles!  I'll probably have them when I'm six.

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