So... most of you know that my little brother is one of my best friends in the entire world.
This is an essay he wrote his freshman year of college about our friendship.
Now that he's graduating, it just seemed appropriate.
I LOVE YOU, AUDIE!
The human mind is not photographic, which is why the idea of photography is appealing. It allows a person to capture a moment in a picture so they can always remember that event. But the photographs don’t just show the event; if you look closely you can see the relationship between the characters. Then by looking at later pictures you can begin to observe a change or development in that relationship. Such is the case with my sister, Anna, and I.
We are sitting in the back seat of a mini van as we drive down the highway. Both furious with the other, arms crossed, brows furrowed, and bodies positioned in opposite directions as if we don’t want to be any where close to the other. Unfortunately, we are buckled in right next to each other. Anna stares huffily out the window of the car, and I glare at the ground. It is as we don’t exist to each other, and in our eyes you see the angry determination never to acknowledge the other’s presence ever again. The enmity between us couldn’t be clearer. The caption to the picture ironically says, “Can’t you tell we’re best friends?”
So why then did my mother choose this moment to remember with a picture? She took the picture because it captured our childhood relationship. Anna is two years older than me, so as an older sister she had to demonstrate that she knew more than I did, and had authority over me. I was a strong willed younger brother, who had to defy her “authority”. I would often tease her because she is a girl, and that is what you do to girls.
I am not sure why we are so upset in this picture: perhaps we had argued, called each other names, or had gotten each other in trouble. It shows our pettiness, and our immaturity, and like many other siblings at this stage of life, we loved each other, but we didn’t like each other. Our relationship up through middle school was bumpy to say the least; we would constantly bicker and squabble over every little thing.
Then I entered high school, and Anna began to drive me to school, and it was just the two of us in the car for half an hour every day. It was then when our relationship began to develop. Our attitudes had changed 180 degrees. No longer were we ignoring each other’s existence; we were as close as we could be, both relationally and literally.
Our faces fill the frame and are pressed together, with eyes level and cheeks touching. Anna smiles widely at the camera, and I smile a little shyly, though both of our eyes alight with happiness. It is a far cry from the previous picture where our whole bodies were turned and we where scowling in opposite directions. Now both our faces and our bodies are facing in towards each other. She goes up on her tip toes so that her face can be level with mine, as I am now several inches taller than she is, and she has her arm around my back pulling me in closer for the picture. She is going out of her way to show for the picture how close we are, to show in a picture what our friendship is really like. There is no one else in the picture, and no way for them to get between us. We both wear the staff shirt, because we have decided to work together at a camp.
She is taking this picture because she is going away to college in the fall, and she wants to have a good picture of us together so she can remember our friendship and the summer we had. It is a picture of us at our best and closest moment, so that when she feels lonely, a thousand miles away at college she can look at it and be comforted by our friendship.
Not long after the dynamic of our friendship changed again as a factor is added. Anna met Kevin. They met at her school, and they later got engaged. I was thrilled for Anna and Kevin, because I knew that they really loved each other, but I was a little concerned when things began to get serious between them, because I didn’t know how it would affect my relationship with my sister.
Things did change, and it is evident in the third and final picture. There are two guys in this picture, Kevin and I, and we are both dressed in blue. Kevin is bearded and I am clean-shaven. It is a hot day, which is apparent because my usually straight hair is curly from the humidity. We are sitting at a counter top at a burger joint in the Chicago. A burger is in my hands as I have just taken a bite, and have begun to chew it. I am looking sideways at the camera, but I can’t smile because of the food in my mouth. Still there is a smile playing around my lips. Kevin’s burger has a bite in it, but sits in the basket as if forgotten as he looks almost skeptically at Anna who is sitting next to him, and is taking the picture, as if to say, “ You are taking this picture now, really?”
No longer am I the closest to my sister; another has moved into that position, but I am okay with it. Our relationship has matured to where I know that Kevin is more important to her, but I know that I am still her brother and one of her best friends. In the picture Kevin is closer, but I am there too. Our friendship is still important enough that she brings me with her and Kevin on a trip into the city.
These photographs show the development of my relationship with my sister, whether it was intended or not. Which is why photography is so important, because you may not remember how you once felt about a person until you see a picture of you two together, like in my first picture. Through photography you can see a change of feelings and a development of friendship over time, like in my case.
